Sometimes, when I dont feel like talking, or suddenly I become very quiet, please do not come forward and provoke me. Please, unless you are very tired of living.

These few days, I was really bothered by certain issues. I do not know if I have handled them the right way. Sigh. I really hate growing up, u know, I really do. Those choices and decision u have to make really gets tougher each day.

Thinking back, I really missed those days where by nth gets harder den having to choose between chocolate ice-creams or vanilla ice-creams. Those childhood days. Those irrational decisions made. After all, I was just a insginificant kid, how harmful could my decisions be?

I dun feel like blogging the whole issue down even though, I really have the urge to do so. I mean, people do read my blog, and I am not really comfortable in sharing this.

In the past, I always turned to this avenue whenever I wanted to express myself. I am not a very expressive person in reality. Hence, any supressed emotions will be blogged. But recently, I think, I am losing this avenue, if u know what I mean.

Is it right to do this? Where excatly should I draw the line? When exactly should I blow up and tell them that I am no pushover? I feel like doing sth, sth to subdise the anger inside me so that I will no longer habour any revengful thoughts. I dun want bad karmas.

I tried to persuade myself to be magnanious and forgiving.I really did tried. But why should I? I could not find a strong enough reason for me to do so. I am not a saint after all. How about revenging? Hurting them twice as much. But am I up to it? Will I be evil and cunning enough to plot against others? or perhaps, I should just let go and never be bothered about their affairs again.

I have been struggling, between these choices.

and I have yet to come to a decision.

what do you think I should do?