My name is Silky.
Monday, July 02, 2007
10:05 PM -
why does every quarrel have to be that hurtful?fuck.
i hate it when i feel like crying.
when can i just stop deceiving myself.
blasting music does not chase away unhappiness at all. not even a single bit.
i am just running away. slow, loping run, limping run.
i am tired of pretending that everything is alright after blasting music in my room.
i had enough of disciplining myself after every setback, limiting myself within the timeframe of a playlist with only a few songs to stretch into my pain and luxuriate in my sadness.
My light is faulty tonight. Table lamp is flickering.
It is as if the light itself knew what a mess i've gotten into and decides to abandon me too.
it wasnt suppose to end like that. it wasnt.